Brew City

104 Shrewsbury Street  Worcester, MA 01604

Emily's delicious creation

What Victoria threw together

Pros:
Numerous topping options
Bar opens early for sad middle-aged men
Lots of Brew City apparel options (how have we gone this long with out a "Brew City" V-neck?)

Cons:
Waitstaff steals from patrons


The Experience: 
For our lucky number 7 stop on our Burger Tour we ventured into the glorious Worcester, Massachusetts and stopped at basically the only street where there is human life: Shrewsbury Street.

Victoria wanted to visit Brew City, as she always blindly recommends it as the go-to place to eat of Worcester to the children on her Ho Cro tours. She felt it was time she determine how accurate her restaurant recommendations are, and maybe take up a career of writing scathing yelp reviews.

In addition, we had a special celeb appearance from the one and only Gillian Martin Biggert. A part-time Ann Arbor, Michigan resident and avid college football fan (GO BLUE, LETS GET DENARDED!!!!!), she enjoys throwing her letters up during rush (AXO IS THE ONLY WAY TO GO) and throwing her phone off the side of hayrides at the annual barn dance in early October. Between all of her Starbucks runs and Natick Collection pit-stops, Jill/Fill decided to grace us with her presence this Thanksgiving break. After surviving all of the "OMG HOW ARE YOU?? I MISS YOU SO MUCH! and GUESS WHO I SAW AT STARBUCKS??"es that come along with Thanksgiving break, we all piled into the mom-mobile (Volvo S60s were never cool regardless of what Jo Anne Aramini says) and found our way to good old route 9.

Mind you, we decided to continue the tour the day after Thanksgiving. Even though we were all a little worried when we woke up Friday morning (well Shannon doesn't really sleep) because we were still full from the 3 Thanksgiving dinners from the day before, that didn't stop us (we're really dedicated to this mission, you're welcome). Per usual, Shannon and Victoria wore the stretchy pants and Emily looked cute sporting this seasons light pinks and browns. Fillian obviously stole the show in her crayola blue vest. Can you say TSM?

The extensive topping options
(please note sambal and grilled banana)

We finally made our way to Shrewsbury Street and wandered inside the restaurant. After awkwardly standing there for 3-5 minutes near the bathrooms, an elderly woman who we later learned was named Sue, escorted us to our table. Emily immediately took a seat facing away from the window because she was too baffled by the Afghanistan restaurant that just opened up across the street. Who knew Emily had a never ending kabob craving? Turns out everyone, she tweets about lamb shanks on the reg.

Brew City is divided into two parts: a bar and a restaurant.  Naturally, at noon on the day after Thanksgiving, the bar was practically full to capacity while we shared the restaurant with only what appeared to be a nice Amish family.  Let's be real, eating turkey, napping, and watching football all day can be really, really stressful.  We all pretended not to see Victoria ripping shots of Barton under the table.

When it came time to order, the stress really piled up. Talk about choices. There are about 5/6 prepared burger options, but unless you like banana and peanut butter on your burger, we'd steer clear. Brew City offers the "build your own burger" option, which allows you to choose not only your toppings, but the type of burger and bun you want as well.  For the indecisive types, this can be extremely overwhelming. Angus or kobe beef? Slaw on top? How do you feel about a grilled banana? And honestly what on earth is sambal aioli? And more importantly, do you want some? It was a rough time for us all and Emily was forced into a game time decision and ended up yelling a rapid-fire list of fifteen choices at Sue, who walked away whimpering. Shannon worked to comfort our waitress by ordering her customary soft drink: aspartame filled diet coke!!!

After a brief 20 minute wait, during which we discussed the events of Thanksgiving, which obvi included endless pie eating and shrimp cocktail consumption, our heaping plates of angus and fries arrived! The burgers were certainly well-crafted: moist, succulent and extremely flavorful. The fries on the other hand were a little sub-par...Emily wasn't impressed with the spud situation (apparently the side of fries she ordered sounded like potato chips). We honestly wouldn't have been surprised to learn if the hunks of potato rolled out of the Ore-Ida bag and into the oven 15 minutes prior. Processed potatoes really aren't our thing. We like freshly hand cut. And if they're going to use store-bought frozen fries, we would have appreciated the potato smily faces.

After approximately the 7 minutes it took us to devour our meals, Sue handed us the bill. Emily, the only one of us who knows how to add and subtract numbers, figured out what we all owe and after paying up, we realized Sue ripped us off. She felt she deserved a 40% tip and didn't bring us any of our change. At the end of the day we realized we overpaid. This would be fine 15 years down the road when all of our trust-fund husbands are taking us out, but right now we're all poor college students.

Important Things to Consider:
Make sure you have a smart phone handy while scanning over the menu...poor Fill had to google half of the burger topping options. Apparently they do not have Intro to "Fried Stuffed Pablano" at University of Michigan #wolverines. Thank god for the 3G network.

Also make sure you have mom/dad's credit card or lots of dolla billz. This place is getting $1.29 for habanero jack cheese and a solid $2 for brie fondue on your burger, I mean COME ON. In a perfect world we would all build burgers that cost $30+ but instead we saved all of our money and made some sacrifices (poor Fillian had to pass on the apple and pear compote (what is that...?)) so we could tip our girl Sue that 40%. Or so she could tip herself, depending on which way you look at it.

Finally, don't go to Brew City when you are starving, because you'll have to spend quite a bit of time picking out your toppings. If you enter Brew City with a need to order quickly, you might get stuck with the grilled banana and peanut butter creation. Like on what planet does that sound appetizing? The only place we think that could possibly be a hit is the monkey cages at the Franklin Park Zoo. Eliminate the post burger stomach ache and stop and think about what you're ordering people. Peanut butter and angus do NOT go together and should never be paired together, we don't care if you haven't eaten in weeks.

RATINGS (1-10 Scale) Price (too expensive-1, fairly priced-10)... 6
Service... 7
Sides... 6
Size... 8
Presentation... 7
Menu Choice... 10
Deliciousness!/Flavor... 8
Time to Get Food after Ordering... 8
How Much Do I Feel Like I Have to Vomit After Eating (yes-1, no-10)... 8
Bang for your Buck... 7
TOTAL... 75/100

Red Robin...Yummm!

70 Worcester Providence Turnpike, Millbury, MA or maybe There's Yummm Near You (actually the slogan of their locations page. Yes, with three Ms)

Ignore the fact that this burger looks like it was
run over by a bus. Emily is a messy eater and
should not be allowed in public.

What We Ordered:

Whiskey River BBQ: Basted with our signature
bourbon-infused Whiskey River^® BBQ Sauce and
lassoed together with Cheddar cheese, crispy onion
straws, lettuce, fresh tomatoes & mayo.

 

Pros:

Carly-Rae Jepsen look alike waitress

Bottomless Fries

Onion Ring Tower

Variety

High School Musical poster

Cons:

Freezing cold

Jumping baby

Some questionable decor

A wait

The Experience:

For our 6th stop on our infamous burger tour, we dined at the one and only Red Robin in Millbury, Mass. (Not really, there are hundreds of Red Robins, but this makes it sound more exclusive) First of all, the plaza where RR is located was hoppin. In fact, there was a wait to get into the place.  We were forced to park approximately a mile from the restaurant itself, on the edge of what can only be described as a small ravine.  When we finally finished the treacherous hike to the front door and walked into Red Robin, the first thought that popped into our head was “There is not enough crap on the walls." Kidding, there are so many random movie posters and pictures of city skylines that we couldn't even tell you the color of the walls.  The neon lights on the walls were so bright and blinding that Shannon immediately regretted not wearing her transition lenses.

Congratulations. You did it.
World's best cup of coffee burger.

Apparently, 6:30 on a Thursday night is when all the cargo short, flat bill wearing, brace faced teenagers in the local area like to hit up the RR ...who knew?  Seeing as their moms dropped them off right at the front door, they made it to the RR before us, and we were forced to suffer through an agonizing 10 minute wait. Right off the bat, the staff was super friendly. It was like they couldn't open the door and hold it fast enough. But can you blame them? Emily and Shannon were convinced it was because of Victoria's eye-catching, Katie Holmes post-divorce inspired outfit #internproblems. Victoria figured it was because of Shannon and Emily's really, really ridiculously good looks. Victoria was correct.

At RR, every server was wearing a shirt that read “World’s Best Burger” across the back, and they sat us under a neon sign that said “World’s Greatest Burger," someone’s cocky. It’s like they knew we were there to judge them. Nothing like a little subtlety. 

After being escorted to a table by our borderline overly-friendly hostess, we realized that the place was pretty much an icebox, pack your snow pants. Shannon, a proud Girl Scout Brownie, was the only one prepared for extreme temperatures, and she quickly whipped out a sweatshirt. Emily and Victoria, who only achieved the Girl Scout Daisy level back in '97, were obviously less prepared and forced to huddle together on the same side of the booth to prevent their lips from turning blue. As it is mid July, you may assume wool socks aren't necessary for a trip to Red Robin, you would be wrong.

Shannon is very impressed by this
feat of engineering.

Seeing as Shannon had the night shift at the hospital awaiting her post burger tour, and Victoria and Emily were looking to pack on a few pounds, we decided to stock up on as much greasy food as possible. In other words, we totally caved and ordered the Towering Onion Rings, which are described by the RR as..."13 rings tall, this proves we really know how to pick ’em and stack ’em. Sweet yellow onions — breaded & crisply fried. Served with tangy Campfire Sauce and ranch dressing for dippin'." Thank god we found the stack on the menu, it was incredibly hard to decipher anything under that neon lighting.

Oh yeah and our waitress was totally Carly Rae Jepsen aka the Call Me Maybe girl. We decided that based on the latest nude-pic scandal involving the infamous 3 word song super star, she was probably trying to live a normal life and keep on the DL (which stands for 'down low' for our elder crowd). What better way to fly under the radar than by being a waitress at the RR? Genius girl. Can't wait for the next 3 word hit: "Red Robin Yum"? Just a suggestion.

We're all in this together. Except
Vanessa Hudgens and all her floral prints.

First of all, our waitress totally never told us what the sauces that accompanied the onion ring stack were. So there we were, three starving young women staring at these peculiar plastic condiment cups filled with a mysterious orange and white sauce. Honestly, that didn't stop us. We totally dug in the second Carly Rae Jepsen left, we didn't want her to think we were hungry or anything. This onion ring stack was killer by the way. Although Shannon isn't a huge chunky onion ring girl (she prefers the strings, what a diva) she still enjoyed the crispy and oily goodness.

As we were waiting for our food, every television in the restaurant was tuned to intense coverage of K 

Stew’s illicit affair with that scrawny, creepily mustached director. As fans of showering, owning shoes other than Converses, and smiling on occasion, we don’t love Kristen Stewart, but celeb gossip this juicy always catches our attention.  Emily was so caught up in her despair over R-Patz's broken heart that she didn't hear Carly Rae offer the table another round of beverages and was forced to sit through the remainder of dinner absolutely parched.

RR provides extra seasoning for your fries.
We chose not to touch it as we feel when you go out
to eat you shouldn't have to season your own food.

Then the burgers came!!! Such excitement. They came all wrapped up in some fancy paper and they came with bottomless fries! That would've been a super awesome feature if we hadn't cleaned up a towering stack of onions prior to. Victoria ordered the Whiskey River BBQ burger, just trying to bring it all back to her non existent Western roots, and Emily and Shannon followed suit. The burger was certainly juicy and very delicious and unbelievably easy to eat! We also decided that the fries were seasoned well, but too chunky. Like seriously the fries were like the width of our hands, you almost had to cut the damn things. It was vaguely like noshing on an entire mushy potato. Good thing Carly Rae gave us forks and knives...

When we finally surrendered to our massive food babies, Carly Rae brought us the check. Like, she didn't even ask if we wanted dessert. HOW RUDE. What if we wanted the Mountain High Mudd Pie? She didn't know that. And neither did we seeing as we didn't even get a dessert menu (We were reduced to performing a Google search to see what the place even offered). Guess she thought we would be full after our onion ring tower, bottomless fries and loaded burgers. This isn't amateur hour, we've been at this for a few months now. #insulted

Important Things to Consider:

Unless you feel like waiting to be seated, you might want to hit up Red Robin on a Tuesday at 3 pm. Who knew Red Robin was such a hot spot? The wait did make sense considering the parking lot was so full we had to park approximately a mile away. However, the far walk to the restaurant justified our purchase of an onion ring tower. #campfiresauce

That paper on the burgers we mentioned actually had a purpose. (Clearly the RR isn't going green any time soon. LOLZ.) It held the burger together while you headed into the thing face first. It was great because lettuce and onions and barbecue sauce didn't go every where. How refreshing. Victoria wasn't covered in ketchup for once and Joanne is now convinced she knows how to eat like a big girl. Yay!  Unfortunately, Shannon eagerly unwrapped her burger the minute it arrived as her common sense levels are minimal and finished dinner with barbecue sauce up to her elbows.  Thankfully Carly Rae was thoughtful enough to provide additional napkins.

Victoria and Shannon's new bestie. 

You will make friends at the RR. Just ask Shannon who instantly befriended the baby who was jumping behind us the whole entire time. Shannon is so above social networking sites. As long as she continues her RR appearances, she will have a 3 year old and under posse in no time. Ugh. Jeal.  Finally a group to watch all her favorite PBS shows with. Arthur re-runs, here she comes. Don't forget Teletubbies (who doesn't love a good bowl of tubby custard?) and Mister Rogers. Emily refused to acknowledge the child, jealous that she couldn't order the rad robin burger or carnival corn dog off the kid's menu. Victoria took the opportunity to take a few pics for the scrapbook.

For those of us working hard to hold onto a fabulous lifestyle much like poor Suri Cruise (Katie made her take a taxi and a commercial plane in the SAME WEEK. Apparently next week they have a subway trip planned? Eek.), your burger can be wrapped in lettuce. Eating burgers sans the bun is just so fabulous. Buns are totally for commoners and totally grungy I guess.  Yeah but there are some wild options: lettuce, whole wheat (yeah, because health is clearly our main mission), gluten-free, and onion.

Also, we need to talk about our options here for a second. Your classic burger accompaniments were offered like coleslaw, fries and salad (for those of you who like food with no taste), but then there was something really bizarre, Freckled Fruit Salad. Like what is that? Stick with fries people. And it's not like they provided a description as to what makes a fruit salad freckled, all we could think of was mold or gingers.

When you leave Red Robin, you will be full.  Like, really full.  As in, your nicest elastic waist pants will feel like they're cutting off circulation to your waist and food twins are growing in your stomach.  If you're headed home to slip into a coma for the next 13.5 hours, this is great.  However, if you're off to work an 8 hour night shift dealing with the nocturnal elderly population, you may want to consider a salad.

Red Robin is kind enough to make a wide selection of condiments available on the tables.  Not only are ketchup, mustard, and good old salt and pepper offered, but the RR provides each table with a bottle of its very own signature blend seasoning.  If you have the sudden desire to rip apart your fully formed burger, season the ground beef, and remold it into the patty shape of your choosing, you're in luck!

RATINGS (1-10 Scale)

Price (too expensive-1, fairly priced-10)...7

Service...9

Sides...7

Size...8

Presentation...7

Menu Choice...9

Deliciousness!/Flavor...8

Time to Get Food after Ordering...7

How Much Do I Feel Like I Have to Vomit After Eating (yes-1, no-10)...4

Bang for your Buck...7

TOTAL...73/100

Ruby Tuesday

32 Lyman Street Westborough plus over 800 other locations.
Clearly someone thinks they're really popular...

What We Ordered:


Classic Cheeseburger                                   

 Smokehouse Burger...Topped with aged New York cheddar,    

applewood smoked bacon, tangy barbecue sauce, and crisp onion            

rings.

Pros:
-Extensive list of side options
-Chunky shoestring fries
-Delicious cheddar biscuits

Cons:
-Interesting crowd
-Ketchup in another goddamn tin cup
-Questionable shape of burger...a little too perfect looking

 The Experience:

For this week's stop on the burger tour, our adventurous selves decided to once again stay within the confines of the Westborough bubble by eating at the Lyman Street Plaza's finest dining establishment, otherwise known as Ruby Tuesday. When we say finest, we mean it. The next classiest restaurant in this plaza is Subway, where they can't be bothered to serve ice from the soda machine, instead you have to grab a handful from a cooler #hygienic. Naturally we dressed to impress for our night on the town. Shannon was sporting her nicest running shorts, and Victoria even upgraded to yoga pants and a Polo t-shirt.  Emily tried to keep up in the fashion department rocking a rather conservative sweater, but it is quite a challenge when she hangs with such stylish friends.

Someone put a lot of a effort into
developing a catchy slogan...

We should start by saying that the crowd Ruby Tuesday attracts at 9 pm on a Friday can only be described as questionable. And we mean questionable, in every aspect of the word. We were immediately distracted by the couple feeding each other Asian dumplings at the table across from us.  Who said chivalry was dead?  Really, what better way is there to set the mood than by placing a deep fried potsticker into the mouth of your significant other at an all-American chain restaurant? Victoria was extremely jealous at this public display of affection seeing as no one has fed her since she was a mere toddler circa 1993. Seeing this riveting display of affection also must have been disheartening for the table-for-one seated beside them, who was spending a relaxing Friday night alone with a novel, glass of Cabernet, and sweater vest.  FUN TIMES. Note to self: Bring Fifty Shades of Grey next time. Maybe she could've struck up a conversation with one of the multiple middle-aged men drinking alone at the bar #woof.  Who would've known Ruby Tuesday was the spot to spend a wild Friday night? And by wild we mean so quiet that you are stared at for speaking at an audible whisper. 

When we finally finished surveying the crowd around us, we got down to business perusing the burger options.  This took an extended period of time, seeing as the burger section is hidden in an extremely obscure section of the menu.  By obscure, we mean smack in the center of the back page, but as honor students, this obviously took us about 10 minutes to discover. In fact, we all began to panic, thinking the joint didn't even sell certified angus. Can you imagine?

Once we found the “Fresh Handcrafted Burger” section, we initially were overwhelmed by the number of options. Then upon actual reading of said menu section, it became clear that in their book anything that can be served on bread is considered a burger. Ruby Tuesday’s management really needs to invest in a dictionary, because according to the Merriam Webster, a hamburger is defined as “a patty of ground beef," not a Chicken BLT or an Avocado Grilled Chicken Sandwich. Seriously, why can't they make another section on the menu, is that really too much to ask? Ruby Tuesday has such a way with words (i.e. "It's All Good Here"), I'm sure they can concoct something eye-catching.

Upon ordering our meals, we were asked what two sides we would like accompanying the burgers. TWO sides, the possibilities were endless! Well not really, there were like ten options, but still. Some of these delicious sides included fries, onion rings, and white cheddar mashed potatoes. There were also tomato, broccoli, and green bean options, but if you actually want to enjoy your meal, then these options should be ignored. Shannon and Victoria went with the classic 50/50 fries and onion rings option we were brilliantly introduced to us at Ted’s. Brandon you were a true pioneer. Emily was the picture of health, dipping her onion rings into the cheesy potatoes #heartattack.
 

Would it kill them to provide us with
more than crumbs for an appetizer?

The highlight of the dining experience was the arrival of the cheddar biscuits.  Ruby Tuesday is kind enough to provide these complementary balls of buttery, cheesy goodness free of charge, and the three of us inhaled them in approximately 2.7 seconds.  The only downside is that as a fine dining establishment, Ruby Tuesday provides only one per guest, so we we were unable to squirrel extras away in our purses as we may or may not do with the rolls at Bertucci's.  Come on, we are on a college budget here.


The cheesy biscuits did not provide enough sustenance for us to be held over for long, so we were far too excited when our meals arrived. Shannon had just finished working a 12 hour shift, and after her two diet cokes, the anticipatory burger jitters had been getting the best of her. Emily was also starving as it had been 45 minutes since her last snack. Victoria on the other hand was beyond the point of hunger and was ready to burst out crying.


Once the burgers arrived the unspoken race began. And you know what race I'm talking about...from the second the waitress places those heaping plates of food down in front of us, who in the heavens will finish first? Wolfing the buttery roll, handcrafted goodness and plentiful sides down were not a problem for any of us. These burgers were surprisingly satisfying. A fair amount of juiciness was provided and the flavor was there, the only questionable aspect was the actual shape of the burger. Why was the patty so perfect looking? The shape of the burger made Victoria extremely uneasy...was this a BJ's special? Victoria truly questioned the quality of the meat...if it even was that. Having read "Fast Food Nation" for 10th grade English class, Victoria could not help but picture tiny little ground up cow bones disguised as fat and flavor on her plate. #eek

Victoria was devastated no one was willing
to feed her like a small child.

Shannon was thrilled to get food after
bathing elders for 12 hours. (She is not a
nursing student, she does that for fun).

Emily was not so secretly admiring
the bald man at the bar.

Important Things to Consider:


Even though located in the buzzing metropolis that is Westborough, MA, one may want to dine at Ruby Tuesday's prior to 9 pm. Shockingly, most of the town was already in bed at this time, thus leaving only cat women and creepy middle aged men to keep us company.


RT's has recently redone their menu, or so we've heard. Prior to our burger research we can't say we've dined here frequently. When we go out it's The Capital Grille, or we're not eating. But sacrifices have to be made to enhance the hamburger knowledge of others #humanitarians. Anyway, the new menu is evidentially part of their push to be fancier. As they begin to cater to a classier audience, gym shorts may become socially unacceptable. Shannon may have to dine elsewhere.


Also, if it's your birthday, don't you dare go into RT's. Like seriously, their Happy Birthday song is even more annoying than Outback's. So for the sake of everyone else in the joint, celebrate your birthday at alternate locations please.


Travel in packs to Ruby Tuesday's. The parking lot is unbelievable creepy post 9pm on a Friday night. Even though we all attend schools in some questionable areas and most likely find ourselves in terrifying environments, the ghetto scene is foreign to the small suburb of Westborough and sadly exists. Buddy system people.

RATINGS (1-10 Scale)

Price (too expensive-1, fairly priced-10)...7

Service...7

Sides...9

Size...9

Presentation...8

Menu Choice...8

Deliciousness!/Flavor...8

Time to Get Food after Ordering...7

How Much Do I Feel Like I Have to Vomit After Eating (yes-1, no-10)...7

Bang for your Buck...7

TOTAL...77/100